50 Best Country Dad Jokes: A Global Guide to Groan-Worthy Puns

By

Zul

Take your humour global with hilarious country-themed dad jokes. From the "big plus" of Switzerland to the "rush" of Russia, these puns are perfect for world-traveling families.

The Positive Flag
What is the best thing about living in Switzerland?
I don't know, but the flag is a big plus!
The Dinner Dilemma
Why is the man so skinny?
Because he's Hungary, but he hasn't eaten in Turkey yet!
The Kitchen Assistant
What did the cook say to the pan?
I need some Greece!
The Speed Demon
What do you call someone who is always in a hurry?
A Russian!
The Race to the End
What happens when you cross the finish line?
You're Finland!
The Stubborn Friend
Can I go to the park?
Norway!
The Bill, Please
What did the waiter say at the end of the meal?
Can I Czech the bill?
The Surprise Reaction
What did the guy say when he stepped into the Middle East?
Oman!
The Hearing Aid
What did the African explorer ask his friend?
Kenya hear me now?
The Farewell
I have to leave now...
I'm Ghana miss you!
The Great Plan
What do you call a man with a plan for Central America?
Panama!
Hygiene Issues
Are there any germs in Europe?
Only in Germany!
The Pizza Preference
Why does the kid love pasta so much?
He's really into Italy!
The Fried Favorite
What do you call potato chips in Paris?
French fries!
The Frozen Aisle
Where do you go to buy frozen food in the North Atlantic?
Iceland!
The Sports Shoes
What country has the best basketball shoes?
Jordan!
The Workout Routine
I stayed in a hotel in Tel Aviv...
It Israelly nice!
The Angry Land
Why is that island so mad?
Because it's Ireland!
The To-Go Order
Is that meal for here or...
Togo?
The Cold Weather
Why was the South American country so cold?
Because it was Chile!
The Travel Agent
Do you have a plan for your trip to Tokyo?
Yes, I have a Ja-plan!
The Fragile Shop
Why shouldn't you bring a bull to Asia?
Because he'll end up in a China shop!
Indoor Activities
Where do you go when you don't want to play outside?
Indonesia!
The Sing-Along
What do you call a tiny opening in the skin that can sing?
A Sing-a-pore!
The Male Sea
What do you call a sea that belongs to a guy?
Malay-sia!
The Morning Greeting
How do you say hello to a friend in Ho Chi Minh City?
Vietnam! (Hi-et-nam)
The Tie Shop
Where do you go to buy a necktie in Southeast Asia?
Thailand!
The Phillipines
What do you call a group of guys named Phillip?
The Philippines!
The Ocean Whale
What country is actually a giant sea mammal?
Wales!
The New Discovery
Why was the country so clean?
Because it was New Zealand!
The Track Star
How did the Middle Eastern man win the race?
I ran! (Iran)
The Solid Ground
What do you call a country made of stone?
Iraq! (I-rock)
The Cold Cube
Why was the Caribbean island so cold?
Because it was full of ice Cuba! (Cubes)
The Gym Teacher
Where do mummies go to lift weights?
The Egypt! (E-gym)
The Large Number
How many people live in South America?
A Brazillion!
The Friendly Greeting
How do you say hello in North America?
Eh, Canada?
The Sweetener
Why was the Northern European country so tasty?
Because it was Sweden!
The Musical Man
Who is the coolest guy in the Middle East?
Yemen! (Yeah-man)
The Social Guy
What do you call a friendly guy from North Africa?
Chad!
The Interior Design
Where do you find the best curtains in Asia?
In-dia!
The Polished Wood
What country is excellent at cleaning floors?
Poland!
The More Rock
Is that a stone or...
Morocco? (More-rock)
The Belgian Bell
What do you call a doorbell in Europe?
A Belgium! (Bell-gem)
The Port for Girls
Where do ladies park their boats?
Portugal! (Port-u-gal)
The Painful Land
What's the most painful country?
Spain! (S-pain)
The Suds of Man
What country is always doing the laundry?
Sudan! (Suds-dan)
The Mali Llama
What animal lives in Africa and loves candy?
The Mali-llama!
The Lousy Land
Why was the country so itchy?
Because it was Laos!
The Regretful Trip
Did you like your trip to South America?
I Pe-rue the day I went!
The G'Day Mate
How do you know if someone is from Sydney?
Australia-lly, they'll tell you!

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